10 Things Coaches Should Reveal to Clients
Many coaches are taught to ask powerful questions, but they are often not taught to be powerful witnesses. There’s a huge difference between holding space and being real in it. So here’s my spicy, soulful list of 10 Things Coaches Should Reveal to Their Clients—not to center themselves, but to model radical honesty, safety, and shared humanity.
1. “I have biases, and I’m doing the work.”
Reveal that you’re aware of your lens—cultural, racial, neurotype, gender, class—and you’re not above it. Say it. Normalize it. It gives the client permission to speak up when something feels off.
2. “You’re not a problem to fix.”
Say it directly. Often. Especially for trauma survivors and neurodivergent folks who’ve been pathologized. Let your presence disrupt that narrative.
3. “Coaching is not neutral.”
Be honest: all coaching spaces are shaped by power, culture, and context. Reveal the frameworks you work within (e.g., trauma-informed, anti-oppressive, neurodivergent-affirming), and don’t pretend you’re “just asking questions.”
4. “I won’t ghost you—but I do take breaks.”
Model boundaries with care. Let them know how you’ll handle missed sessions, emotional fatigue, or time off. You teach them how to care for themselves by how you care for yourself.
5. “I believe you.”
When clients share something vulnerable—gaslighting, assault, grief, addiction—be explicit. "I believe you." The impact of that cannot be overstated. This is nervous system repair in real time.
6. “We can pause, slow down, or do less.”
Reveal that healing and growth don’t require hustle. Show them that pausing is not failure. It’s data. It's dignity.
7. “I don't know, but I’m willing to explore.”
Humility is holy. You’re not a guru. Modeling curiosity teaches clients to trust their own instincts instead of outsourcing their worth.
8. “I’ll name it if I see a pattern—but you always have the final say.”
Reveal your observations with care, not ego. Invite collaboration. Power-sharing is part of the process.
9. “You don’t have to be consistent to be worthy.”
Normalize uneven progress, big feelings, disappearing acts, and coming back again. Especially for ADHDers, creatives, and trauma survivors. This statement is a damn healing spell.
10. “You’re allowed to outgrow me.”
Say it from the heart. Your role is to support, not tether. Let your clients know that your deepest wish is for them to need you less.
About the Author
Minal Kamlani is a trauma-informed ADHD recovery coach based in NYC. She works with neurodivergent adults in recovery from trauma, burnout, and survival-based coping. Her coaching blends structure and nervous system awareness to help clients reclaim function—without shame or perfectionism. Learn more at Higher Vibes Coaching.