Higher Vibes Coaching Blog
These posts were written for leaders who seek coaching and coaches working at the intersection of identity, trauma, and recovery.
Welcome to the Blog
Didn’t Do Your Coaching “Homework”? Why That’s the Best Time to Show Up.
Didn’t follow through on your coaching action plan? That moment isn’t failure—discover how reframing that changes everything to help you move forward. Showing up anyway builds real confidence, sharpens self-trust, and helps you create strategies that actually work in your life—not just on paper.
Your Best Employees Have Side Hustles. That’s the Point.
Dear recruiters and hiring managers, side hustles aren’t a red flag—they’re a power move. People with lives outside work think more sharply, burn out less, and don’t play office politics. If your team needs extra income, that’s a pay issue—not a loyalty problem.
The Hidden Cycle: How Abused Mothers Harm Their Children
When abused mothers lose control of their own lives, they often reclaim it through strict parenting, emotional manipulation, or overprotection—continuing a cycle of trauma. Explore how domestic abuse impacts moms, the hidden costs on children, and how to start to break free from generational patterns of control.
How to Shut Down Unsolicited Advice and Micromanagement with Confidence
Some people believe they have the right to tell others what to do, but their need for control doesn’t mean you have to give in. Learn how to recognize and respond to unsolicited advice and micromanagement with direct, confident strategies that help you reclaim your autonomy and set clear boundaries—without unnecessary conflict.
Workplace Bullying and the Nervous System: How to Respond Without Losing Yourself
Workplace bullying isn't about power — it's about a dysregulated person offloading their panic onto you. Learn why bullies target confident people, what chronic exposure does to your nervous system, and how to fight back without losing yourself.
When People Quietly Root Against You — Use the STAND Method
Ever notice who softens when you rise—but leans in when you fall? That’s not random. It’s Schadenfreude. Learn the S.T.A.N.D. Method to protect your energy, stay grounded in your reality, and handle it in real time—with exact phrases that shut it down without pulling you into the drama.
The R.A.C.E. Boundary Method: How to Set Boundaries Without Guilt or Burnout
Discover the Receive–Ask–Choose–Express (R.A.C.E.) method to set boundaries without guilt or burnout. A trauma-informed framework built for ADHD and autistic folks, BIPOC professionals, and recovering people-pleasers who want clarity and sustainable connection.
Read This if People Don’t “Hear” What You Have to Say
This is a practical guide for anyone tired of being talked over or ignored. It’s especially for you if anxiety, trauma, bullying, culture, or neurodivergence have minimized your voice. Here’s a step-by-step way to bring your voice back online—gently, clearly, and on your terms. These steps aren’t about being louder — they’re about feeling safe and confident enough that your voice doesn’t have to hide.
High, Numb, or Healing? Rethinking Your Relationship with Weed
Weed can soothe, silence, or support you — depending on how you use it. Learn the science, spot your patterns, and find harm-reduction tools that help you heal.
Using Genograms To Understand Generational Trauma
“Just live with it” isn’t resilience—it’s survival passed down as strength. This article explores how generational trauma becomes identity, and how coaches can use genograms to trace emotional inheritance, unmet needs, and patterns of silence. By mapping family systems with empathy and boundaries, trauma-informed practitioners help clients replace endurance with connection, creating space for self-trust and intergenerational healing.
Before You Hire a Coach: How Their Background Shapes Your Care
Not all coaches are built the same. This guide unpacks how a coach’s background — HR, therapy, sales, or spirituality — shapes the care they offer. Learn how to spot performative empathy, evaluate training, and choose a trauma-informed coach who honors your nervous system and your boundaries.
Coaching’s Empathy Problem: How Performance Culture Hijacked Presence
Many coaches talk about empathy—but few embody it. This essay exposes how performative empathy, toxic positivity, and the pressure to “look caring” are re-traumatizing clients and burning out practitioners. Learn the neuroscience behind real attunement, how false empathy activates the brain’s pain pathways, and five embodied practices to rebuild authentic presence in your coaching work.
When People Police You: Their Reactions Say More About Them Than You
When people correct your tone, shrink your expression, or accuse you of being “too much,” it’s not about your behavior — it’s about their discomfort. This article explores the psychology of tone policing, projection, and envy in personal and professional spaces. Learn why people react defensively to authenticity, how silence enables control, and what it means to stand in your power without apologizing for it.
Beyond Sobriety: Recovery Coaching Tools that Work
Trauma-informed recovery coaching goes deeper than therapy—helping you understand emotions, unmet needs, and nervous system patterns. Using tools like the Feeling Wheel, Relational Needs, and attachment-based recovery frameworks, you’ll heal the root causes of addiction, perfectionism, and emotional disconnection.
The Heartache of “Passing”
Passing as white, straight, or able may look like a privilege, but it often feels like exile. Here’s an honest look at the science, strain, and healing of masking race, sexuality, and whatever your identity is.
Wayward and “Hot Seat” Therapy: Why These Methods Cause More Harm Than Healing
Confrontational counseling, attack therapy, and “hot seat” methods—like those dramatized in the Wayward series—are harmful, retraumatizing, and linked to poor recovery outcomes. Learn safer, trauma-informed alternatives.
ADHD and Eating Disorders Overlap — and How Recovery Coaching Can Help
ADHD and eating disorders often overlap. Learn how a trauma-informed recovery coach helps with binge eating, food struggles, and ADHD-friendly routines.
Recovery Coaching: How Two Sessions Can Transform Your Mindset and Self-Care
Looking for a food addiction recovery coach? Discover how just two sessions can transform your mindset, support food recovery, rewire patterns, and foster healthier self-care choices.
It Sucks to Be Scapegoated for Telling the Truth
When you name what’s not working—at work or in your family—you’re often seen as the problem, even when you’re trying to create safety or help. This piece offers insight into why truth-telling can make people defensive and what it can cost to stay honest in systems built on silence.
When “You Got This Feels” Like a Slap
Tired of hearing “You got this!” when you’re barely hanging on? Here are 15 phrases that sound supportive—but can actually leave you feeling alone—and what to say instead to get the real help you need.